loredanatv
01-11-2009, 09:36 AM
FRANCESCA
by bobby
Frank was driving down Oak Street, looking for the house where his friend
Rick said the party would be. He couldn't wait to meet this Filipina broad
he'd been promised would be there. He loved Asian girls, and was getting
pretty excited. He'd always heard that they were pretty submissive and would
basically do whatever a guy wanted, but he'd never had an opportunity to
ever bag one. "Tonight's the night.", he smiled to himself. (As you can see,
Frank didn't exactly possess the charm of Cary Grant.)
Before I continue, however, let's go back in time a couple of hours and catch
up. You see, Frank just didn't respect women at all. At 22, he had had a lot
of women, but always made sure he was gone before they woke up in the
morning. The last thing he wanted was to have to TALK to one of them first
thing in the morning; he had better things to do. Needless to say, after word
got around Frank was finding it harder to get dates in the sleepy suburban
town of Wedgewood, and slowly had to expand his territory to the
neighboring towns, which leads us to the real story.
Frank had been down to the local mall to do some holiday shopping, with
Christmas just a couple of weeks away. He wanted to get it done early today
so he had time to get ready for the big party tonight in Westwick that Rick
had told him about. Rick said a girl that worked in his office would be there,
a hot Filipina named Francesca. Frank didn't need to hear anymore, that won
him over right there. The icing on the cake was that Francesca had only been
in the States for a short time and hadn't met anybody yet, she was pretty shy,
so Frank figured this one was in the bag already.
Anyway, I digress. As Frank wandered the mall, he realized he needed just
one more gift, but he couldn't figure out what to get. None of the stores had
anything more in which he was interested. Just as he was about to give up
and leave, he noticed a new shop in one of the less traveled side corridors in
the mall. "Spells R Us?", Frank thought. "I've gotta check this place out."
He opened the old-fashioned door(how many mall stores had wooden
doors?) and heard a bell jingling as the door closed behind him. "Man, what a
funky place this is!", he thought, as he looked at the shelves full of all kinds
of junk, covered in about three feet of dust.
"Well, it may be funky, Frank, but it's my place and it's a living."
Frank jumped about a foot in the air, he could have sworn that old man
appeared out of nowhere. He was dressed in an old cotton bathrobe with a
bunch of weird symbols and what not, with a goofy looking pointy hat. Even
weirder, though, was that he knew Frank's name, and even WEIRDER than
that was the fact that Frank hadn't spoken that line out loud. "How did you
know my name?", Frank asked incredulously.
"I know a lot of things, Frank, but never mind that. What can I do you for
today?", the old man asked.
"I need a gift."
"For the girl at the party tonight?", the old man asked with a twinkle in his
eye.
"Uh..", Frank was kind of freaked out by what this old guy knew, and was
getting pretty uneasy, but then said, "Well, no actually, but now that you
mention it I am really interested in bagging this chick, so that might be a good
idea." "Why would I tell a complete stranger something like that?", he
thought to himself, shocked as he was.
The old man went on without missing a beat. "Just what I thought, Frank.
Shouldn't you kind of get to know her first, though?"
"No, I'm not interested in her life story, I just want some action." "What the
hell am I saying?", he thought again, but he just seemed to want to speak the
truth to the old man. The old man paused a second and said, "O..K.., if
that's what you want I think I have something that'll serve you right, er,
well. Can you hold on for a second? I'll be right back." He disappeared into
the storage room in back.
Frank stood there stunned, as he thought about what just transpired. "I'm like
Jim Carrey in 'Liar, Liar', I have to tell the truth to this nut."
After what seemed an hour, Frank just wanted to leave, but something made
him wait until the old man came back with a dusty box.
"This should do the trick for you, Frank." He handed him the box. Frank
opened it and found nothing but a piece of paper inside, with a bunch of
writing on it in a Gothic style.
"What is this?"
"It's a spell," the old man replied. "It'll make you very attractive so that you
shouldn't have any trouble accomplishing your goal tonight."
"Spell? What are you talking about?"
"Well, since you've been a little slow on the uptake, Frank, I'll tell you. You
see, I'm a wizard, and all these items you see around here are magical. My
job is to supply my customers with whatever is necessary to fill their needs."
"Come on, man. Just because you dress like Merlin doesn't make you a
wizard!", Frank scoffed.
"Well, Frank, I thought you might feel that way so I'll make you a deal. That
particular spell normally costs $50. I'll give you that spell for free, so you
can try it and see if it works. If it does, you can come back tomorrow and pay
me the money. If it doesn't work, you owe me nothing and we're square. Do
we have a deal?"
Frank thought for a second, and said, "I still think this is crazy, but it can't
hurt. I'll try it."
"Good. Just read the directions on the paper, follow them exactly, and you're
home free."
"OK.", said Frank and took the box home. He didn't notice the shop fade
away as he walked toward the mall door.
When he got back he started getting ready for the party, which didn't take
long because all he wore was a flannel shirt and a pair of jeans, with his
everyday work boots (Frank wasn't much into fashion, either, which didn't
help his love life.). He read the spell, which was very simple and easy to
follow: it just involved a couple of lines he had to repeat three times, some
gibberish about seeking the help of the sprits, or something like that. He felt
kind of foolish doing it, but thought he had nothing to lose anyway. When he
finished, a wind came up out of nowhere, and blew through his bedroom,
and the writing on the paper glowed with a pink light briefly, then it was
over. He ran to the mirror to see if he looked any different, but noticed
nothing. "Just what I thought.", he said disgustedly to himself. Then he
noticed a line of fine print at the bottom of the page:'Please allow two to three
hours for this spell to take effect.'. "Yeah right, we'll see."
---
That brings us up to the present, as Frank found the house he was looking
for. There were a ton of cars parked in the street, so he had to park three
blocks away and walk back. He noticed Rick's car as he made his way back
to the house. As he stepped inside, he found the house was full of people. He
searched the rooms until he found Rick.
"Frank, glad you could make it."
"Thanks, Rick. Is your friend here yet?", Frank asked hopefully.
"No, but she will be. She was looking forward to being here."
"OK, I'm gonna grab a beer and I'll be right back."
Frank pushed his way through the crowd and was wondering if anything was
happening yet, it had been about two hours now since he recited the spell. He
passed a mirror in the hallway and took a look but nothing seemed different.
"Maybe I stay the same, but she'll just think I'm really attractive.", he
thought, then asked someone where he could find the keg so he could get a
beer. Just as he got over to where the keg was, Frank suddenly became very
light-headed and nauseous, and ducked ran into the bathroom. Locking the
door behind him, he leaned back against the door and closed his eyes, hoping
this awful feeling would go away. After a minute or so he actually did feel a
little better, and he turned on the water to splash his face to cool down a little
bit. As he toweled off, he happened to glance at the mirror over the sink, and
noticed something very peculiar: his hair appeared to be turning black. As he
watched he could see his roots darken, then it spread out from his scalp. It
now appeared to be not so much black as a very dark brown, and soon his
formerly blond hair was totally brown.
Frank closed his eyes and shook his head, trying to clear the vision from his
mind, but when he looked again the blond was still gone. "What the hell?!
This is impossible!", Frank said to himself, but unfortunately it was reality.
PART1
by bobby
Frank was driving down Oak Street, looking for the house where his friend
Rick said the party would be. He couldn't wait to meet this Filipina broad
he'd been promised would be there. He loved Asian girls, and was getting
pretty excited. He'd always heard that they were pretty submissive and would
basically do whatever a guy wanted, but he'd never had an opportunity to
ever bag one. "Tonight's the night.", he smiled to himself. (As you can see,
Frank didn't exactly possess the charm of Cary Grant.)
Before I continue, however, let's go back in time a couple of hours and catch
up. You see, Frank just didn't respect women at all. At 22, he had had a lot
of women, but always made sure he was gone before they woke up in the
morning. The last thing he wanted was to have to TALK to one of them first
thing in the morning; he had better things to do. Needless to say, after word
got around Frank was finding it harder to get dates in the sleepy suburban
town of Wedgewood, and slowly had to expand his territory to the
neighboring towns, which leads us to the real story.
Frank had been down to the local mall to do some holiday shopping, with
Christmas just a couple of weeks away. He wanted to get it done early today
so he had time to get ready for the big party tonight in Westwick that Rick
had told him about. Rick said a girl that worked in his office would be there,
a hot Filipina named Francesca. Frank didn't need to hear anymore, that won
him over right there. The icing on the cake was that Francesca had only been
in the States for a short time and hadn't met anybody yet, she was pretty shy,
so Frank figured this one was in the bag already.
Anyway, I digress. As Frank wandered the mall, he realized he needed just
one more gift, but he couldn't figure out what to get. None of the stores had
anything more in which he was interested. Just as he was about to give up
and leave, he noticed a new shop in one of the less traveled side corridors in
the mall. "Spells R Us?", Frank thought. "I've gotta check this place out."
He opened the old-fashioned door(how many mall stores had wooden
doors?) and heard a bell jingling as the door closed behind him. "Man, what a
funky place this is!", he thought, as he looked at the shelves full of all kinds
of junk, covered in about three feet of dust.
"Well, it may be funky, Frank, but it's my place and it's a living."
Frank jumped about a foot in the air, he could have sworn that old man
appeared out of nowhere. He was dressed in an old cotton bathrobe with a
bunch of weird symbols and what not, with a goofy looking pointy hat. Even
weirder, though, was that he knew Frank's name, and even WEIRDER than
that was the fact that Frank hadn't spoken that line out loud. "How did you
know my name?", Frank asked incredulously.
"I know a lot of things, Frank, but never mind that. What can I do you for
today?", the old man asked.
"I need a gift."
"For the girl at the party tonight?", the old man asked with a twinkle in his
eye.
"Uh..", Frank was kind of freaked out by what this old guy knew, and was
getting pretty uneasy, but then said, "Well, no actually, but now that you
mention it I am really interested in bagging this chick, so that might be a good
idea." "Why would I tell a complete stranger something like that?", he
thought to himself, shocked as he was.
The old man went on without missing a beat. "Just what I thought, Frank.
Shouldn't you kind of get to know her first, though?"
"No, I'm not interested in her life story, I just want some action." "What the
hell am I saying?", he thought again, but he just seemed to want to speak the
truth to the old man. The old man paused a second and said, "O..K.., if
that's what you want I think I have something that'll serve you right, er,
well. Can you hold on for a second? I'll be right back." He disappeared into
the storage room in back.
Frank stood there stunned, as he thought about what just transpired. "I'm like
Jim Carrey in 'Liar, Liar', I have to tell the truth to this nut."
After what seemed an hour, Frank just wanted to leave, but something made
him wait until the old man came back with a dusty box.
"This should do the trick for you, Frank." He handed him the box. Frank
opened it and found nothing but a piece of paper inside, with a bunch of
writing on it in a Gothic style.
"What is this?"
"It's a spell," the old man replied. "It'll make you very attractive so that you
shouldn't have any trouble accomplishing your goal tonight."
"Spell? What are you talking about?"
"Well, since you've been a little slow on the uptake, Frank, I'll tell you. You
see, I'm a wizard, and all these items you see around here are magical. My
job is to supply my customers with whatever is necessary to fill their needs."
"Come on, man. Just because you dress like Merlin doesn't make you a
wizard!", Frank scoffed.
"Well, Frank, I thought you might feel that way so I'll make you a deal. That
particular spell normally costs $50. I'll give you that spell for free, so you
can try it and see if it works. If it does, you can come back tomorrow and pay
me the money. If it doesn't work, you owe me nothing and we're square. Do
we have a deal?"
Frank thought for a second, and said, "I still think this is crazy, but it can't
hurt. I'll try it."
"Good. Just read the directions on the paper, follow them exactly, and you're
home free."
"OK.", said Frank and took the box home. He didn't notice the shop fade
away as he walked toward the mall door.
When he got back he started getting ready for the party, which didn't take
long because all he wore was a flannel shirt and a pair of jeans, with his
everyday work boots (Frank wasn't much into fashion, either, which didn't
help his love life.). He read the spell, which was very simple and easy to
follow: it just involved a couple of lines he had to repeat three times, some
gibberish about seeking the help of the sprits, or something like that. He felt
kind of foolish doing it, but thought he had nothing to lose anyway. When he
finished, a wind came up out of nowhere, and blew through his bedroom,
and the writing on the paper glowed with a pink light briefly, then it was
over. He ran to the mirror to see if he looked any different, but noticed
nothing. "Just what I thought.", he said disgustedly to himself. Then he
noticed a line of fine print at the bottom of the page:'Please allow two to three
hours for this spell to take effect.'. "Yeah right, we'll see."
---
That brings us up to the present, as Frank found the house he was looking
for. There were a ton of cars parked in the street, so he had to park three
blocks away and walk back. He noticed Rick's car as he made his way back
to the house. As he stepped inside, he found the house was full of people. He
searched the rooms until he found Rick.
"Frank, glad you could make it."
"Thanks, Rick. Is your friend here yet?", Frank asked hopefully.
"No, but she will be. She was looking forward to being here."
"OK, I'm gonna grab a beer and I'll be right back."
Frank pushed his way through the crowd and was wondering if anything was
happening yet, it had been about two hours now since he recited the spell. He
passed a mirror in the hallway and took a look but nothing seemed different.
"Maybe I stay the same, but she'll just think I'm really attractive.", he
thought, then asked someone where he could find the keg so he could get a
beer. Just as he got over to where the keg was, Frank suddenly became very
light-headed and nauseous, and ducked ran into the bathroom. Locking the
door behind him, he leaned back against the door and closed his eyes, hoping
this awful feeling would go away. After a minute or so he actually did feel a
little better, and he turned on the water to splash his face to cool down a little
bit. As he toweled off, he happened to glance at the mirror over the sink, and
noticed something very peculiar: his hair appeared to be turning black. As he
watched he could see his roots darken, then it spread out from his scalp. It
now appeared to be not so much black as a very dark brown, and soon his
formerly blond hair was totally brown.
Frank closed his eyes and shook his head, trying to clear the vision from his
mind, but when he looked again the blond was still gone. "What the hell?!
This is impossible!", Frank said to himself, but unfortunately it was reality.
PART1